Uncomfortable Growth

I want to grow up. I don't want to stay ignorant of the deeper truths of God's word, but I want-- as the writer of Hebrews urges me-- to move from the elementary principles and eat the meat of the word. This longing gnaws at me, as another, equally powerful desire holds me back. The war within my flesh. I don't pretend to understand how I can possess two opposing and equally powerful desires at once. The contradiction of this is stagnating, almost crippling. I want to grow, but I don't want to be uncomfortable. I want to live for Christ with total abandon of myself, but what does this mean for my future? Fear overwhelms, and I shrink back. Lord, show me how to live, really live for you.

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Beware Of The Eternal Now

Nothing lasts forever, right? Well, nothing earthbound anyway. Of course God is forever. And so is the human soul. But circumstances, life experiences-- good and bad-- are all momentary. We read that "the world is passing away along with its desires, but whoever does the will of God abides forever" (1 John 2:17). But sometimes we feel like we're in a forever moment. No matter how much life moves around us, a specific circumstance may feel like it will never change. These forever moments can be good or bad. I remember getting married the feelings of joy and contentment that immediately followed that I felt wouldn't change. Or when I graduated college, or after having my first child. These moments of joy I wanted to last forever. But hardships come and with them bad forever moments. Like arguments, difficult pregnancies, unemployment, and lost friendships. The longer I live the more I find my forever moments are difficult. I love the line in Laura Story's song ...

Unmasking The Gospel

L ike it or hate it, masks and other protective measures are here to stay, at least for the foreseeable future. I’ve felt a “stuck in the middle'' attitude towards them with deeply opinionated friends on both sides. Through this I’ve found that there’s thoughtful information and well-meaning believers on both sides of the Covid response. When we take an “us versus them” mentality on such superficial issues, we are divided and inadvertently mask the Gospel-- dear reader, this shouldn’t happen! When we focus on all of the litany of rules and regulations, we're ignoring a burgeoning truth pulsing under the Covid crisis. The gospel doesn't have to be masked! There's no sign saying "No Gospel allowed" (yet!). When Paul was in prison he wrote a letter speaking of rejoicing because even though he was in chains, the gospel was not chained, the word of God was not chained. Now, the entire world fraught with a disease-- or fraught with the response to this disease-...

Free From Doing Whatever I Want

Often we think freedom is being unshackled to do whatever we want. This is the greatest bondage though. Only in Christ can we be free from doing whatever self desires. To will against oneself is utterly impossible unless the Spirit of God is birthed in us. And when this happens, the war begins. The Spirit against the flesh, the flesh against the spirit-- before the Spirit entered it was simply self reigning. Now there's an adversary to my selfish desires who can conquer me as I can not. Oh praise the Lord for Him, who makes freedom possible, though not comfortable or easy, lest we think we no longer need Him. This breaking of self feels at times as though ripped apart within, tortured between desire and will. Yet the best freedom is within reach-- the abundant life that Christ offers. Deny yourself, take up your cross, and follow Me. Oh if I only lived this way always! To live against selfish desires is to truly love-- only think of it, how much you could serve, how much you co...

a surrendered life

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